Thursday, August 26, 2010

Leave the Gun, Take the Cannoli.

Last night, I had a dream...

I dreamed that my husband and I were running frantically through the woods.

We were running so frantically because we were being chased by a giant grizzly bear.

Nathan was carrying Maggie and I was carrying Rocco, and we continued to run.

Every now and then, we would stop running, see how far away the bear was, and then we would manage to squeeze through these tiny little holes (think a buried pvc pipe) and belly crawl to the other end, then we would resume running....only the bear would be closer because belly crawling through tiny little holes is obviously a waste of time.

Now, the funny part of this dream is how much my father would have hated it. You see, watching movies with my dad will teach you one lesson:

"Don't drop the weapon!"

This lesson is always YELLED at the screen when someone (generally the helpless damsel in distress) runs out of ammunition and decides to then chuck their gun at the head of their enemy rather than search for more ammunition. This is my father's greatest pet peeve...and that's saying something, because he has a lot of them.

Now, throughout the course of this dream, I went against all my training and instincts and somehow threw about 16 different guns at the bear. I kept stumbling across more guns, and rather than shooting the bear, I just pitched the gun at its head...hoping my aim would somehow be improved this way :/

It went something like this:

1. Stumble across gun.
2. Stare at it as if thoroughly confused.
3. Turn to face the bear.
4. Chuck gun. Hard.
5. Possibly hit bear in face.
6. Turn and run again because gun impact did no damage to said bear.
7. Repeat steps 1 through 6.

Towards the end of the dream, we got to a house. Now, the smart thing would have been to lock the doors behind us and just be at peace....but instead, we let the bear chase us into the house.

We hid in the shower.

The bear found us.

We managed (puppies in hand) to entice the bear into the shower, get ourselves out of the shower, and pull the shower curtain down on top of the bear, thus hopelessly entangling it.

Now, mustering every ounce of instinct I had left in my body, (but being out of guns, having thrown them all at the bear's head) I whacked the bear with the shower curtain rod, knocking it out.

We then peacefully strolled outside, took our keys out of Nathan's pocket, got into our 2005 silver Honda Odyssey and drove to safety.

This is not a "pregnant" dream. I have these kinds of dreams all the time. I just had to post this one for my father. :)


~Stephanie said...

Ohhhh, this is SO a pregnant dream!!!!!
1. You are carrying Rocco . . . NATHAN's baby.
2. There is the imagery of squeezing through tight holes. I mean, come on.
3. And the bear (bare) represents your fear. And where do you plan to face this fear? Outside your home? NO!!! You have invited it inside for a big ol' homebirth!
4. Chucking the guns at it just represents the fact that, though you are prepared with all the right information and equipment, you still don't know how to deal with the threat of pain.
5. The Honda odyssey represents, well, nothing except the fact that I bought one today and your brain just wanted to include it in the show.

That was fun. Have another dream!

Nathan Anderson said...

Wow, MIL, that was awesome analysis!!!

I had a dream about ants on our cement wall (think dorm room), which rocco and maggie found while all four of us were laying on the dorm-sized bed. When I realized what they (the dogs) were doing, I encouraged them to eat them. (That's all I remember.) What say ye?

And, Kacey, this is funny.

~Stephanie said...

The dorm room setting represents broke but happy times. All the 'family' is together. The ants just represent the 'small problem' of not enough money. Hence, the dogs" needs to fend for themselves.

Either that, or you just have a nagging ant infestation!

NinjaPrincess said...

I once had a dream about Pippi Longstockings visiting a monastery. :)